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笔下小说>淡定 英文>第17章 我们为什么不快乐 3

第17章 我们为什么不快乐 3(第2页)

1。Badstuff,athebottomofthescale。

atthebottomof:在……的底部

快乐由你决定

ASimpleTruthAboutHappiness

佚名Anonymous

Iarticularlyhappydlikemostteenagers,Ireveledinmyangst。Oneday,however,itoethatIwastakingtheeasywayout。Anyonecouldbeunhappy;ittoeoreffort。Truegelayinstrugglingtobehappy。

&hatwehavetoinessesasomanypeople。Weassumeit’safeelingthatesasaresultofgoodthingsthatjusthappentous,thingsoverwhichwehavelittleornotrol。

Buttheoppositeistrue:happinessislargelyunderourtrol。Itisabattletobewagedandobea>

Toachieveahappierlife,it’sooverblingblocks,threeof>

parisonwithOthers

Mostofuspareourselveswithahinkishappier—arelative,anaeonewebarelyknow。Ioayoungmanwhostruckmeasparticularlysucdhappy。Hespokeofhisloveforhisbeautifulwifeaers,andofhisjoyatbeingaradiotalk-showhostinacityheloved。Irememberthinkinghewasohoselueverythilesslyright。

&artedtalkingabouttheI。Heblesseditsexisteoldme,becausehecouldlookupinformationonmultiplesclerosis—theterriblediseaseafflighiswife。Ifeltlikeafnothinguedinhislife。

ImagesofPerfe

Almostanyofushaveimagesofhowlifeshouldbe。Theproblem,ofcourse,isthatonlyrarelydopeople’sjobs,spousesandliveuptotheseimaginedideals。

Here’sapersonalexample:Nooneinmyfamilyhadeverdivorced。Iassumedthatmarriagewasforlife。SowhenmywifeandIdivorcedthreeyearsafterthebirthofourson,myworld。Iwasafailureinmyowneyes。

Ilaterremarriedbutfidedtomywife,FranthatI’tshakethefeelingthatmyfamilylifehadfailed。Sheaskedmeithourfamilynow(whicludedherdaughterfromaprevieandmyson)。Ihadtoadmitthat,asidefromthepaihmysononlyhalfthetime(myex-wifeaody),ourfamilylifewaswonderful。

“Thenwhydoeit?”Sheasked。

That’swhatIdecidedtodo。ButfirstIhadtogetridoftheimageofa“perfect”family。

“MissingTile”Syndrome

&ivewayofsabotagiolookatsomethiedoflaw。It’slikelookingupatafileddtratingonthespacewhereoileismissing。Asabaldmantoldme,“Wheeraroom,allIseeishair。”

&yearsstudyinghappiness,ahemostsignifisI’vedrawnisthis:thereislittlecorrelatiohecesofpeople’slivesandhoytheyare。Amomeionshouldmakethisobvious。eoplewhohavehadarelativelyeasylifeyetareessentiallyunhappy。Andhohavesufferedagreatdealbutgenerallyremainhappy。

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