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笔下小说>安东尼这些都是你给我的爱>第5章 爱在无语时Words from a Father2

第5章 爱在无语时Words from a Father2(第1页)

第5章爱在无语时WordsfromaFather(2)

Inhisroom,Daretchedoutoartedtoleaveforthetriphome。Itriedtothiosaytogivehimdceashestartedthisnewphaseoflife。Again,wordsfailedme。Imumbledsomethinglike,“HopeyoufeelbetterDan。”A。

Now,asIstoodbeforehim,Ithoughtofthoselostopportunities。Howmanytimeshaveweallletsuentspass?Aboygraduatesfromschool,adaughtergetsmarried。Weghthemotionsofthey,butwedoourandfitotellthemwhattheyhavemeanttous。Orwhattheymightexpecttofatheyearsahead。

Howfasttheyearshadpassed。DanielwasborninNewOrleans,LA。,in1962,slowtowalkandtalk,andsmallofstature。Hewasthetiinhisclass,buthedeveloingnatureandularwithhispeers。Hewasatedandagile,andhebecameadeptinsports。

Baseballgavehimhisearliestge。HewasanoutstandileLeague,aually,asasenihsadethevarsity,winninghalftheteam’sgameswitharecordoffivewinsandtwolosses。Atgraduation,theedDaeam’smostvaluableplayer。

Hisfihough,cameataschoolscefair。Heenteredashowiorysystemworks。Itrimitiveandcrude,espeparedtothefanputerized,blinking-lightmodelseherstudents。Mywife,Sara,feltembarrassedforhim。

Itturhattheotherkidshadheirowshadmadetheirexhibits。Asthejudgeswentontheirrouhattheseotherkids’taions。DanielansweredeveryohejudgesawardedtheAlbertEinsteihebestexhibit,theygaveittohim。

BythetimeDafehestoodsixfeettallandweighed170pounds。Hewasmusdiion,buthe,havinggivenupbaseballflishliterature。Iwassorrythathewouldnotdevelophisathletit,butproudthathehadmadesuchamaturede。

&oldDahegreatfailinginmylifehadbeenthatIdidn’ttakeayearortwoofftotravelwhenIfinishedcollege。Thisisthebestway,tomywayofthinking,tobroadenoneselfanddevelerperspelife。OnceIhadmarriedandbegunw,Ifoundthatthedreamoflivingiurehadvanished。

&aboutthis。Hisfriendssaidthathewouldbeihishold。Buthedecideditwasn’tsocrazy。Aftergraduation,heworkedasawaiteratcollege,abikemessengeraer。Withthemoneyheearned,hehadenoughtogotoParis。

&beforehewastoleave,Itossediryingtofigureoutsomethingtosay。Nothiomihought,itwasosayanything。

Whatdoesitmatterinthecourseofalife-timeifafatherellsasohinksofhim?ButasIstoodbeforeDadoesmatter。Myfatheraher。Yet,Ialwaysregrettedneverhearinghimputhisfeelingsintowordsandneverhavihatmoment。Now,Icouldfeelmypalmssweatandmythroattighten。Whyisitsohardtotellasohingfromtheheart?Mymouthturneddry,andIknewIwouldbeabletogetoutonlyafew

“Daniel,”Isaid,“ifIcouldhavepicked,Iickedyou。”That’sallIcouldsay。Iwasn’tsureheuoodwhatImeaowardmeandthrewhisarmsaroundme。Foramoment,theworldandallitspeoplevaherewasjustDanielandmeihesea。Hewassayimyeyesmistedover,andI’tuandwhathewassaying。AllIasthestubbleonhisashisfacepressedagaiheeowork,aafewhourslaterwithhisgirlfriend。

Thatwassevenweeksago,andIthinkabouthimwhenIwalkalongthebeaweekends。Thousandsofmilesaway,somewhereoutpasttheowavesbreakiedshhtbesgacrossBermain,strhamustyhallwayoftheLanelbowiBaIhadsaidtoDanielwasdtrite。Itwasnothiwaseverything。

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