我在等你。
我在等你啊！
I'vealwayslovedyou。Al>
EvenwhenIwasyou，Irememberwantingtoplaywithyou。Butyoudidn'tlivenearme，sowe't。Ididn'tknowwhereyoulived，butIkifyoucould，you'dplaywithme。We'dplaycatch，orhide-and-seek，orwhateveritlay。Ilayyames。Iwaoteachmehowtoplaywithyou。
SoIplayedbymyself。Butyouweretherewithme。Ipreteyouwerewithme。Iedtoplaywiththeotherkidsonmyblock。Ihadyou。
Momalwaystoldmetogooutsideandplaywiththeboysdoor。She'tuandwhyIdidn'tlayinlittleLeagueorjointheBoyScouts。ShedidhatIwaswithyou。Ididn'tneedanyoneelse。
Iwouldn'tcallitloveatthatpoint，though。Ididnotknowwhatlovewas。Ijustwahyouverybadly。Ididn'thaveafeeling。
&heotherboysatschoolstartedtopaymoreattentiontogirls，Ididn'tfeelsobad。TheywerebeginniandwhatI'dbeenfeeliheyneededawoman。Andthegirlsheystartedtomatdsomeofthemarestilltogethertoday。Loveissobeautiful>
IsayIdidn'tfeelbad，butthatwasonlyatthebegiheywouldaskmeifIhadagirl。I'dsayyes，andofcoursetheywouldwanttoknowwho。I'ttellthem。IhadtomakeupsomestoryaboutmeetingyouwhenIwasatmygras'plaerva。Along-distahiheguysthoughtthatwascool。Otherscalledmealiar。Itriednottocare。Itriednottoworry。
AtnightIwouldlieihinkaboutyou。Iwoyouhaddoday。Didyoulikeyourschool？Whatwasyourbestsubject？Ialreteyou'dbegoodatEnglish。Ipicturedymelohowmue。You'dsighhugsandkisses。
Iwoimesifwaitingwashardforyou。Iwonderedifyouhadaboyfriend。Iknewyouwouldn'tbeseriousabouthim。You'dleavehimthemomentwecouldbetogether。I'dgetalittlejealousthinkingaboutit，though。IwahefirsttotouchyouifIcould。Thefirsttokissyouandholdyourhand。Youwouldbemyfirst。Ididn'twantanyoneelse。
Duriicedthattherewerefewerandfewerpeoplestillbythemselves。Everyone。Someofthegirlsinmyclasswerewearirings。Theywereproudsandwouldshowthemtoeveryohem。OnedayIweoreatthemallarings。Ipickedoutanieforyou。Itwasgold，withasmalldiamondiing。Ididn'tknowwhatysizewas，soIboughtomysmallestfinger。Ifiguredwecouldgetitfixedlater。Icarriedthatrihetime。Iwaogiveittoyouassooher。
&dayIthoughtaboutyourhandsalot。Ipicturedmyselfholdingthemandlookiihepalms。Itriedtoimaginehowsmallyourhandsmightbe。Hiletheymightbe。InmydreamsyouwouldtouchmyfacewithyourtihefiipswouldtouchmylipsandIwouldkissthem。
IworkedhardiudiedtlybecauseIwaagoodjobwhenIgraduated。Ididn'twantourlivestosufferbecauseI'tprovideforus。AftercollegeIgotawell-payingjobwithaninsuranpany。Aftersavingfortutadowowo-bedroomhouse。Ithadalargekitdagreatbedroomforthetwoofus。Ijustknewyouwouldloveit。Whehehouse，Itriednottobuytoomuiture。Ididn'tigyouwouldn'tlikelater。Justthebasics。
&imesIwouldsitohresholdofthefrontdoor。Iwouldstaredowandwatcheverycarthatpassedby。Onedayyoumightbeihosetedthattohappensomuch。
Thebedwastoobigforjustoneperson。Iakemyselfstretchoutorsleepinthemiddle。Istayedoeyouwerewithme。SomenightsIostheary。IwouldrollotosayyourIdidn'tknoas。Iwouldjustcallyou"Love。"
"Love？"Youwouldsmileatme。
"Areyouhappywithme？Areyougladyouwaitedforme？"
Youwouldn'tanswer。You'djustreadtouchmylipsandfeelmyface。Icouldfeelyourhandsonmyface。Youcouldfeelmytears。
"Iloveyousomuch。"
Theyearswentby。Itriedtoimagiy。Ikhere。Ikhepersonwho'smeabeouttheresomewhere。Itwouldjustbeamatterofwaiting。IknewIcouldwaitforeverforyouifIhadto。Ilovedyou。
WhenmymomdiedIwaslefttohahearrasmyself。IthadjustbeenherandI，andwe'dgroartoverthelasttwentysomeoddyears。OmassheaskedmewhenIwasghomeagirl。I'tsayanythingtoa。I'teveheeyestherestofthenight。Iwantedbadlyforyoutomeether。Shewouldbesoproudofme。Soproudthathersonhadsuderfulwoman。Itwouldbeperfect。
ButasIwatchedherbeihegrave，Ididn'thaveaandingwithme。Ididn'thaveaoshowmymom。I>
ThatnightIcried。IcriedbecauseIdidn'thaveyouwithmetoholdmeahingwasalright。Ididn'thaveahandtoholdorlipstokiss。Nothing。I'dhatandperhapsneverwould。
EagIlookedatmyselfihewrinklesaroundmyeyesweregettingdeeper。Myhairhadthinnedandreceded。Ihopedyouwouldloveme。Ihopedyoucouldstilllookatmyfadsmile。
"Iwanttoseeyousmile。"thenursesays。
I&#is。
"Ifyoudon'tsmileformeI'mgoingtotururs，"thenursewarns。Ihateher。Sheisalwaystryingtomakemedosillythingslikesmileh。Shehaspaininherlife。
Leavemealone。
"oestheTV。Goodnight，sir。"Shetursandshutsthedoorbehindher。Mysmallbedroomdisappearsintothedark。Ihearherfootstepsasshewalksdowhefootstepsfade，andthenallIhearisthedistanteyheart。Atearslowlyfindsitsillowddies。Myworldbeesquiet。
I'malone。
It'sdarkandI'malone。
Whydidn'tyouevere，Love？
Iwaitedforyou。
Iwaitedforyou。