第6章母亲的手（1）
Mother'sHands
珍妮·艾默斯JanieEmaus
Asteenagersweliveiworldfromourmothers，aworldwheremoutontheperipheries。Ofosteveryoheyareunavoidableannoyances。
Today，asIapproachthatedge，asIamtheoheteeer，Ilookatmymhdifferenteyes。AimeswishIcouldhalttheyearsandstrowiopherfrherself。
&mykittableasthesundesignsamosaicoflightoheflhter，Anna，sitsomymother。
“WhenisRigtobehere？”mymotherasks，referringtomyhusband。
“Idon’tknow，Mom，”Ialy。“He’llbeherefordinner。”
Isighaupfromthetable。Thisisatleastthetenthtimeshehasaskedthatquestioninasmanyminutes。
&heranddaughterplayMonopoly，Ibusymyselfmakingasalad。
“Don’tputinanyonions，”Momsays。“YouknowhowDaddyhatesonions。”
“Yes，Mom，”Ianswer，shovingthessbate。
Iscruboffadtobite-sizepieces。Ithrustthekheoreforisnecessary。Aslicefallsontothefloor。
“Don’tputanyonionsinthesalad，”sheremindsme。“YouknowhowDaddyhatesonions。”
ThistimeIswer。
Ijustkeepg，g，tearing。IfonlyIcouldchopawaytheyears，shredtheagefrommymother’sfads。
Mymotherhadbeeiful。Shestillis。Infact，mymotherisstilleverythingshehasbeen，justabitfetful。Itrytoyselfthat’sallthatitis，andifshereallytrated，shewouldherselfsomuch。Thereisn’tanythingwrongwithher。
Icutofftheendofthecudrubitagaiotakeawaythebitterejuiceoozesoutthesides。Wouldn’titbeniceifalluuationscouldbesoeasilyremedied？drub。ThisisatrickIhavelearnedfrommymwithatrillis：g，sewing，dating，laughing，thinking。Ilearogrowup。Ilearthroughemotions。
Ahatwhenmymotherwasarouobeafraid。
SowhyamIafraidnow？
Istudymymother’shands。Hernailsarenhtred，butpaipink，almostnocoloratall。AndasIstareatthem，IrealizeIamnatthosehahemastheyshapedmyyouth。Handsthatpackedathousandlundwipedamilliontearsoffmycheeks。Handsthattufideoeaylife。
Iturnawayandthrowthecutothebowl。Asme。Myhandshavegrownintothoseofmymother’s。
Handsthathaveeatenmeals，heldmyowndaughter’sfrightehefirstdayofsddriedtearsoffherface。
Igrowlighthearted。Ifeelmymotherkissmegoodoseeifthewindowisloblowanotherkissfromthedoorway。ThenIammymthatsamekisstoAnnaoffthatsamepalm。
Outsideeverythingisstill。Shadowsfallamorees，shapedlikepiecesofapuzzle。